Volume 2 quotes on Futurama
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- Zapp Brannigan 13 citations
- Philip J. Fry 10 citations
- Bender Bending Rodríguez 8 citations
- Hubert J. Farnsworth 4 citations
- Turanga Leela 3 citations
Zapp: It was almost the perfect crime, but you forgot one thing: Rock crushes scissors ... but paper covers rock ... and scissors cut paper. Kif, we have a conundrum. Search them for paper, and bring me a rock.
Kif: Um, sir, you're supposed to be cutting the ribbon right now.
Zapp: No matter. I'll simply cut it from here with the ship's laser.
Kif: Sir, I don't think that's wise.
Zapp: Kif, if there's one thing I don't need it's your I-don't-think-that's-wise attitude.
Zapp: No matter. I'll simply cut it from here with the ship's laser.
Kif: Sir, I don't think that's wise.
Zapp: Kif, if there's one thing I don't need it's your I-don't-think-that's-wise attitude.
Glab: The evidence against Zapp Brannigan is strong. However, in light of his years of service, and the incompetence of this hillbilly prosecutor, I'm afraid I must dismiss all charges.
Zapp: I'd like to make one final statement. Kif, c'mere and hold up the flag. And wave it a little, for God's sakes.
My friends, you can take away a man's title and his uniform but you can never take away his integrity or his honour.
Plus it was mostly Kif's fault.
Kif: What?
My friends, you can take away a man's title and his uniform but you can never take away his integrity or his honour.
Plus it was mostly Kif's fault.
Kif: What?
One day a man has everything, the next day he blows up a $400 billion space station and the next day he has nothing.
It makes you think.
It makes you think.
He edged out my old mark by two seconds ... and 16 minutes ... and 12 hours. I do plan to finish someday, Kif.
Hm, words I never say. Oh, I know! "Thanks"!
Well, this is just great! What's the point of living if I can't say "ass"? [He gasps.] Hey, I didn't blow up! Ass, ass, ass, ass, ass! Alright! I'm back in the saddle!
Zapp: So it's you I've been attracted to! Oh, God, I've never been so happy to be beaten up by a woman.
Leela: Let's do it again sometime.
Leela: Let's do it again sometime.
It's the one word the robot uses more than any other. We got it from this convenient database of his 10 most frequently-used words.
Number 10, chump; number 9, chumpette; number 8, yours; number 7, up; number 6, pimpmobile; number 5, bite; number 4, my; number 3, shiny; number 2, daffodil.
And Bender's number one most frequently-uttered word, the word which, if uttered, will blow up this entire planet: Ass.
Number 10, chump; number 9, chumpette; number 8, yours; number 7, up; number 6, pimpmobile; number 5, bite; number 4, my; number 3, shiny; number 2, daffodil.
And Bender's number one most frequently-uttered word, the word which, if uttered, will blow up this entire planet: Ass.
My God, cover yourself. I didn't live a thousand years and travel a quadrillion miles to look at another man's gizmo.
[singing] I'm walking on sunshine, whoa-oh.
A little lower. Lower. Lower. A lot lower. Too low! ... Lower!
Ford: Frankly, I've never felt voting to be all that essential to the process.
Nixon: No kidding, Ford.
Nixon: No kidding, Ford.
Ndnd: Little one, get out of there. I'm going to count to blorx!
Jrrr: But, elder one--
Ndnd: Flingle…glorg…glorg and a gloob…
Jrrr: But, elder one--
Ndnd: Flingle…glorg…glorg and a gloob…
Leela: Thank you, Jrrr. I hope you'll always think of me as your mom.
Jrrr: When my species grows up, we eat our moms!
Jrrr: When my species grows up, we eat our moms!
Oh, they're great! They're like sex, except I'm having them!
They're tasty, right? Let's call 'em "Tasticles".
According to government records, the only names not yet trademarked are "Popplers" and "Zitsels".
[singing]
Pop a Poppler in your mouth,
When you come to Fishy Joe's,
What they're made of is a mystery,
Where they come from, no one knows,
You can pick 'em,
You can lick 'em,
You can chew 'em,
You can stick 'em,
If you promise not to sue us,
You can shove one up your nose.
Pop a Poppler in your mouth,
When you come to Fishy Joe's,
What they're made of is a mystery,
Where they come from, no one knows,
You can pick 'em,
You can lick 'em,
You can chew 'em,
You can stick 'em,
If you promise not to sue us,
You can shove one up your nose.
