Quotes

Bart Simpson-doll: Eat my shorts!
Bender: Okay! [Eats the doll's shorts.] Mmm, shorts.

We just need to conceal your intelligence and honesty in a hipper, dumber package.

Fry: Now that you mention it, I do have trouble breathing underwater sometimes. I'll take the gills.
Organ Salesman: Yes, gills. Then, uh, you don't need lungs anymore, is right?
Fry: Can't imagine why I would.
Organ Salesman: Lie down on table. I take lungs now, gills come next week.

Leela: Wait! I want you to look me in the eye and promise you won't get behind the wheel without some kind of alcoholic beverage in your hand.
Bender: I promise nothing!

Kif: Um, sir, you're supposed to be cutting the ribbon right now.
Zapp: No matter. I'll simply cut it from here with the ship's laser.
Kif: Sir, I don't think that's wise.
Zapp: Kif, if there's one thing I don't need it's your I-don't-think-that's-wise attitude.